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One​-​sided Friendships

by One-sided Friendships

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1.
2.
You live reversed, you drive the hearse for something gold. And that's bold (but I don't like one bit of it. I pin myself up on the wall, I nail myself up by the throat. Can't things be forgotten anymore? Is it just everyone, or am I not really going fucking crazy? I smell solutions, but never really reaching any. It's touch-and-go, I know my soul, and I know patterns of behavior. I know it really feels abstruse, but I'm starting to get the hang of it. I won't let go of it. I wanna stop regressing. Always touching, but never feeling. Never reeling in my favors, I am on my best behavior, I will not shut up till this plane reaches Philly and I can stop worrying about all my worries. And I feel filled up to the brim of the mental cup, the veil never staying up for long. Love, silence, and dying - all things worth trying.
3.
4.
"You sycophant!", you said. Inappropriate convulsions I had in your bed. The whole way home I walked thinking how it feels to praise solitude. It seems to me I'm late - it doesn't take a minute to get out of here. I beg of you, pull kismet, appear! You've radically changed - you've got an angel in your brain. My flyleaf life - a vicissitude, [I'm] practically petrified. There are days in which we don't do anything at all. I beg of you, just take the fall!
5.
6.
T.S. Elliott 02:09
7.
Naoko 03:39
My Pelafina, mother of a pugilistic bastard - your argumentative hubris is not safe. It's not for me. It's making me feel alone. My Naoko - what I said to you then was set in stone. We had our doubts, and it's not homely, but there's no second I've lived you can't call your own.
8.
Through phony winters and snack bar summers and public pools, you still ruled. You asked me: "Don't you think that it is time for us to burn everything down?" I frowned. In sickly winters we'd attend to our shivers, to each his own. I'm picking up the phone to empty white - the city's rioting and I'm still picking at age-old sores. I am over. I am over and able. You ask me to "try and keep myself together when the lights go down." Are you done? I wanted to say that I can but it's no wonder if I don't. I wanted to say that I tried to stay alive, even if for just throught the night. [Even if for just throughout the night,] we'll be alright.
9.
Eulogy 02:06
Eulogies for things are ridiculous but we did those. I can't tell anyone what we did those nights, they wouldn't understand what we did. Hiding from them then - pillow forts and loud alarms - we had the charm that nobody knew meant boyhood. It felt good to feel for the first time. [For the first time] I regress. We were talking less and less. Bedrooms made a mess, a message missed. I know now that what I want is for love lives to end so friendships could start, and we could both just stay less smart and thirteen. Are you in?

about

thank you: david foster wallace, haruki murakami, mark z. danielewski, t.s. eliot, and every other artist i've shamelessly plagiarized

credits

released January 9, 2015

vocals, handclaps, toy trumpet, everything else - me

Evan Lescallette - vocals on tracks 2,4
Ben Curttright - vocals on track 3
Meitar Almog - vocals on track 8

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